I am so excited...he comes home today. Almost 7 months later and we get to hug him, kiss him, know he is safe! We get to love on him and get back to our regular lives! We get to have meals together again, we get to play together, snuggle, and have family time! Over the last months, every time we were having family time or a family day, L would always remind us that our family was missing someone! Now we get to have him home with us again!!!
Several thoughts that I will probably expand on later...
1. It is not hard to not cheat for almost 7 months apart. I do not understand wives/husbands who cheat. It is really not that hard to adore and stay faithful to my husband from afar.
2. This (the deployment) was A LOT harder than I thought it was going to be; taking care of the kids, managing the house, taking care of our schedules and trying to be here for phone calls and skype calls from daddy, being everything for everyone! It was rough.
3. The kids are resilient. Though we would much prefer to have daddy home, they did survive me parenting alone.
4. Marine Corps. keeps the spark in the marriage! The anticipation could kill me!
5. God always provides just right when you need.
6. "I CAN do ALL things through HIM who gives me STRENGTH!"
Will add pictures and more later...off to finish getting ready!!!
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Sunday, November 13, 2011
What a life!
I am so absolutely blown away by the difference in our lives since Oct. 27. That is the day when the boys had tubes put in their ears. While Caleb is his same huggable, lovable, sweet self; Connor is a different child!
Prior to tubes Connor would throw tantrums up to 3 times per day for up to one hour at a time. There were times he would tantrum so badly I was convinced something had to be wrong and was moments away from calling 911. For a child to be thrashing and screaming for that long there surely had to be something wrong, right? I have worked with kids who tantrum, and believe me those kids who have Autism know how to throw a fit... But I had never seen one so violent where absolutely nothing would distract or help him. There seemed to be no apparent cause or solution. He would just violently thrash until he was exhausted and then be done. I didn't understand why. I didn't know what started it. I didn't know what to do. I even kept a log of the situation right before the tantrum, possible triggers, who was around and what was happening. Not once was there a connection or obvious reason. I was perplexed! Apparently strong-willed and fluid on the ears preventing hearing are a REALLY bad combination!
The differences include so many things. He has not thrown one major tantrum since walking out of the hospital! He has suddenly become a boy who loves giving and receiving affection. Before he couldn't be bothered with a hug or a kiss. He comes to ask me for help now which was NEVER the case before. He asks for kisses when he gets hurt now. He smiles almost all the time! He laughs with his brother and sister all the time now. Whereas before he spent most of his time screaming at them and me. He responds to my efforts to comfort or distract him when he is hurt of frustrated. He has not screeched the ear-piercing screech that made me want to slap him each time he did it. Each screech made my ears feel as though they were shattering which prompted a visceral response that urged me to silence the source! Thankfully God somehow brought just enough patience that I never hurt him, but I was frustrated with him frequently. I am no longer at the end of my rope or yelling all the time. This is just the difference for me! Can you imagine how the world has opened up to this now happy-all-the-time little boy?!?!?!?!
He seems to be no longer feeling frustrated and outraged all the time. He is not uncomfortable or in pain anymore. He understands what is going on and how to get help when he needs it!!!!!
I am so excited for the change in our lives!!!! I am even considering giving up the maid. That is huge. I am excited that for 2 weeks my kids are acting like typical kids. I can't imagine having a child with a life-long developmental difference and the stress level which can result! We are so so grateful to have turned this corner and for life to be improving each day!
Prior to tubes Connor would throw tantrums up to 3 times per day for up to one hour at a time. There were times he would tantrum so badly I was convinced something had to be wrong and was moments away from calling 911. For a child to be thrashing and screaming for that long there surely had to be something wrong, right? I have worked with kids who tantrum, and believe me those kids who have Autism know how to throw a fit... But I had never seen one so violent where absolutely nothing would distract or help him. There seemed to be no apparent cause or solution. He would just violently thrash until he was exhausted and then be done. I didn't understand why. I didn't know what started it. I didn't know what to do. I even kept a log of the situation right before the tantrum, possible triggers, who was around and what was happening. Not once was there a connection or obvious reason. I was perplexed! Apparently strong-willed and fluid on the ears preventing hearing are a REALLY bad combination!
The differences include so many things. He has not thrown one major tantrum since walking out of the hospital! He has suddenly become a boy who loves giving and receiving affection. Before he couldn't be bothered with a hug or a kiss. He comes to ask me for help now which was NEVER the case before. He asks for kisses when he gets hurt now. He smiles almost all the time! He laughs with his brother and sister all the time now. Whereas before he spent most of his time screaming at them and me. He responds to my efforts to comfort or distract him when he is hurt of frustrated. He has not screeched the ear-piercing screech that made me want to slap him each time he did it. Each screech made my ears feel as though they were shattering which prompted a visceral response that urged me to silence the source! Thankfully God somehow brought just enough patience that I never hurt him, but I was frustrated with him frequently. I am no longer at the end of my rope or yelling all the time. This is just the difference for me! Can you imagine how the world has opened up to this now happy-all-the-time little boy?!?!?!?!
He seems to be no longer feeling frustrated and outraged all the time. He is not uncomfortable or in pain anymore. He understands what is going on and how to get help when he needs it!!!!!
I am so excited for the change in our lives!!!! I am even considering giving up the maid. That is huge. I am excited that for 2 weeks my kids are acting like typical kids. I can't imagine having a child with a life-long developmental difference and the stress level which can result! We are so so grateful to have turned this corner and for life to be improving each day!
Connor off to surgery.
Coming out of it! This part was horrible! Each boy screamed and thrashed for about 30 minutes. Then it was over and our lives are changes! Thank goodness for our 2 friends who came with us!
Caleb is ready to go!
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
College
My 10-year college reunion was last week. Wow. "That is crazy to me to think about" is of course what everyone says. Because of the reunion which I missed (living in Japan put a damper on that one) I have been thinking about my college years. For almost two weeks I had dreams every night about the what ifs and maybes of all the big decisions I made back then. Boy I sure knew nothing and the older I get the less I realize I know.
Sad to say, but I really don't remember college very much. I of course remember close relationships but not a lot of the college experience. I am not sure what happened to those years other than I know I worked hard. I think the working hard is what did it for me. I went on about 4 hours of sleep per night almost the whole time. Between 18 hours/semester, working off campus (many weeks up to 30 hours/week), work study, being an RA and soccer, I have very few and very vague memories of those years.
I do remember my college recruiter saying that I would be married by the time I graduated and I looked at him confused. Why would I get married in college? I was there to get a degree! Then after my first year at York I think there were about 21 weddings...and I figured out what the recruiter was talking about.
I remember hating school the first 2 years and then loving it the last 2 1/2. That would be because I met some very dear friends who I still keep in my heart. But most of the time in York is a blank. I didn't have a camera and I think that is a huge part of why I don't remember much. There is nothing to look at and reminisce about. I also have a terrible memory which is something my daughter has already figured out; she is very patient when I am constantly forgetting things.
About all I remember is being poor...I once was so poor I had no $$ to fill up my gas tank and my boyfriend at the time had to push my car into the gas station and put gas in it. I was too proud to ask but since he pushed the car into the gas station I suppose I really did need the help with a little gas. I remember one semester living on crackers and cheese and when my roommate felt sorry for me she would give me a can of tuna.
I don't even remember doing homework...which I must have done because I graduated with a 4.0 in my major and with honors overall. But how or when did I do it?
I don't know what we did for fun. I don't remember much at all which is such a shame. I am certain that college has played a HUGE roll in who I have become, I just don't remember how I got here.
I hope that my children don't have to work like I did when they go to college. And I will definitely be sending them with a camera!
What are your memories of your late teens and early 20's?
Sad to say, but I really don't remember college very much. I of course remember close relationships but not a lot of the college experience. I am not sure what happened to those years other than I know I worked hard. I think the working hard is what did it for me. I went on about 4 hours of sleep per night almost the whole time. Between 18 hours/semester, working off campus (many weeks up to 30 hours/week), work study, being an RA and soccer, I have very few and very vague memories of those years.
I do remember my college recruiter saying that I would be married by the time I graduated and I looked at him confused. Why would I get married in college? I was there to get a degree! Then after my first year at York I think there were about 21 weddings...and I figured out what the recruiter was talking about.
I remember hating school the first 2 years and then loving it the last 2 1/2. That would be because I met some very dear friends who I still keep in my heart. But most of the time in York is a blank. I didn't have a camera and I think that is a huge part of why I don't remember much. There is nothing to look at and reminisce about. I also have a terrible memory which is something my daughter has already figured out; she is very patient when I am constantly forgetting things.
About all I remember is being poor...I once was so poor I had no $$ to fill up my gas tank and my boyfriend at the time had to push my car into the gas station and put gas in it. I was too proud to ask but since he pushed the car into the gas station I suppose I really did need the help with a little gas. I remember one semester living on crackers and cheese and when my roommate felt sorry for me she would give me a can of tuna.
I don't even remember doing homework...which I must have done because I graduated with a 4.0 in my major and with honors overall. But how or when did I do it?
I don't know what we did for fun. I don't remember much at all which is such a shame. I am certain that college has played a HUGE roll in who I have become, I just don't remember how I got here.
I hope that my children don't have to work like I did when they go to college. And I will definitely be sending them with a camera!
What are your memories of your late teens and early 20's?
Thursday, October 6, 2011
The list goes on...
Our deployment has been filled with lots of adventure:
One ER visit for L
Dr visit for ear infections
back thrown out
22 vomits/cribs changes in 11 days
hand, foot and mouth on all 3
more double ear infections
about 5 different viruses going through the kids other than the hand, foot and mouth and the ear infections
boys going to have ear surgery for tubes
one boy identified as DD -- temper tantrums, sensory issues and language delays
audiology appointments
ENT appointments
EI appointments for OT and SLP
I believe there was another ER visit in there for one of the boys
back hurt again
getting fat because I now eat when stressed and there has been a lot of stress (didn't know this about myself until my metabolism slowed and the gaining started)
My brother leaving for the sandbox doing a VERY dangerous job
car blew up
other car died
L broke her toe or jammed it really bad
I have had one night of really good sleep since May
Boys referred for the Developmental Pediatrician because they are having so many issues
One seizure
To think that there are still 2 months left of this "adventure" makes me want to vomit, convulse, and run away all at the same time. At least we don't have cancer, at least we don't have cancer, at least we don't have cancer has been my mantra lately. Because I frequently feel that is the only thing to be thankful for...then I remember all the blessings and try to hold onto that.
Blessings:
Family members who send cards, email, call and send packages and write FB notes
Friends who send packages, cards, call and leave FB notes
Books sent to all of us
Bath and Body sent to us
Goodies for the kids
My mom was able to come help at one of our lowest points
Friends here who are making us meals, calling and literally shoulders to cry on
Friends who have watched the kids for a bit, run to the store for us or picked up necessities for us
People from church who (even though we haven't been there in months because my children are always sick or I am too overwhelmed to try and get 3 kids going by myself) still continue to check on us
Respite care for the kids
Free to our family child care
The fact that even though I have never felt worthy to have any friends, I have more close friends than I can count
People who make me laugh
We continue to have the maids come once a week who are a life saver in the midst of our chaos
Connor has made so much progress since bringing a cat into our home
The cats -- Beastie and his "Foster" sister Fiona
Looking forward to a trip to Australia
Being able to get a hold of M right away when we need his support or to let him know about something going on
M's unit and the wives of his unit have been such a support
Even though I am not at the point where "if I had the choice I would do it all over again" cause right now I think if I had the choice I would not have children...I do love my kids. I am trying to get past the point that if there were no children in my life, there would be only 2 adventures on the "adventure" list above. I have always been a "rather not love at all" than a "better to have loved and loss than never loved at all" person. This may sound crazy to you, but when I met Matthew, I told him I would rather miss out on knowing him then to have him break my heart. He got it right way and has only made my heart bigger and better and I trust that he will not ever break my heart.
However, those kids are still blessings with their snotty kisses, giggles, smiles and for those few moments when they actually play together without anyone getting hurt. When L gets excited about something and can't hardly talk or when Caleb walks up to me and kisses my leg for no reason at all, or when I get the the child care center and Connor runs to me with a smile that spreads across his WHOLE face! When the kids are actually laughing together and talking about daddy. When Connor tried to comfort Lexi today because he understood she didn't feel good. When Caleb walks up to one of the cats and lays his head on the kitty. When the kids pick up the phone and try to call grandma or dadda....these are all moments I love. Sitting on the hallway floor reading a book or when L gets so wrapped up in her imagination that she truly sees a different world in our living room....these are all blessings. Alright, maybe I would still have those monsters again if I had the choice...but don't let the word get out ;).
Thank you for being part of the blessings list as we struggle to make it through the "adventure" list.
In about 68 days there will be one of the biggest blessings of the WHOLE year of 2011! So hang in there with us and please continue to love on us as we try to make it through.
PS look at that, is the blessing list longer than the adventure list. Thanks God!
One ER visit for L
Dr visit for ear infections
back thrown out
22 vomits/cribs changes in 11 days
hand, foot and mouth on all 3
more double ear infections
about 5 different viruses going through the kids other than the hand, foot and mouth and the ear infections
boys going to have ear surgery for tubes
one boy identified as DD -- temper tantrums, sensory issues and language delays
audiology appointments
ENT appointments
EI appointments for OT and SLP
I believe there was another ER visit in there for one of the boys
back hurt again
getting fat because I now eat when stressed and there has been a lot of stress (didn't know this about myself until my metabolism slowed and the gaining started)
My brother leaving for the sandbox doing a VERY dangerous job
car blew up
other car died
L broke her toe or jammed it really bad
I have had one night of really good sleep since May
Boys referred for the Developmental Pediatrician because they are having so many issues
One seizure
To think that there are still 2 months left of this "adventure" makes me want to vomit, convulse, and run away all at the same time. At least we don't have cancer, at least we don't have cancer, at least we don't have cancer has been my mantra lately. Because I frequently feel that is the only thing to be thankful for...then I remember all the blessings and try to hold onto that.
Blessings:
Family members who send cards, email, call and send packages and write FB notes
Friends who send packages, cards, call and leave FB notes
Books sent to all of us
Bath and Body sent to us
Goodies for the kids
My mom was able to come help at one of our lowest points
Friends here who are making us meals, calling and literally shoulders to cry on
Friends who have watched the kids for a bit, run to the store for us or picked up necessities for us
People from church who (even though we haven't been there in months because my children are always sick or I am too overwhelmed to try and get 3 kids going by myself) still continue to check on us
Respite care for the kids
Free to our family child care
People all over the world praying for us during our rough times
People who make me laugh
We continue to have the maids come once a week who are a life saver in the midst of our chaos
Connor has made so much progress since bringing a cat into our home
The cats -- Beastie and his "Foster" sister Fiona
Looking forward to a trip to Australia
Being able to get a hold of M right away when we need his support or to let him know about something going on
M's unit and the wives of his unit have been such a support
Even though I am not at the point where "if I had the choice I would do it all over again" cause right now I think if I had the choice I would not have children...I do love my kids. I am trying to get past the point that if there were no children in my life, there would be only 2 adventures on the "adventure" list above. I have always been a "rather not love at all" than a "better to have loved and loss than never loved at all" person. This may sound crazy to you, but when I met Matthew, I told him I would rather miss out on knowing him then to have him break my heart. He got it right way and has only made my heart bigger and better and I trust that he will not ever break my heart.
However, those kids are still blessings with their snotty kisses, giggles, smiles and for those few moments when they actually play together without anyone getting hurt. When L gets excited about something and can't hardly talk or when Caleb walks up to me and kisses my leg for no reason at all, or when I get the the child care center and Connor runs to me with a smile that spreads across his WHOLE face! When the kids are actually laughing together and talking about daddy. When Connor tried to comfort Lexi today because he understood she didn't feel good. When Caleb walks up to one of the cats and lays his head on the kitty. When the kids pick up the phone and try to call grandma or dadda....these are all moments I love. Sitting on the hallway floor reading a book or when L gets so wrapped up in her imagination that she truly sees a different world in our living room....these are all blessings. Alright, maybe I would still have those monsters again if I had the choice...but don't let the word get out ;).
Thank you for being part of the blessings list as we struggle to make it through the "adventure" list.
In about 68 days there will be one of the biggest blessings of the WHOLE year of 2011! So hang in there with us and please continue to love on us as we try to make it through.
PS look at that, is the blessing list longer than the adventure list. Thanks God!
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
4 and 1/2 more...
months that is. Why is it that 4 and 1/2 sounds so much shorter than 5 months away? For whatever the reason (probably cause no one is currently sick) I am feeling good about life today.
L woke me up the other morning with a smile. She told me that she had slept wonderfully because of her dreams. She was dreaming of when daddy gets home! That was a beautiful way to greet the day!
The next morning I awoke to giggles. Beastie was giving L her kisses and she was giggling from the joy of her kitty kisses. I am so blessed to have 3 amazing kiddos!
Not too much is going on here. With the web page being updated frequently, I don't have much to tell you on here. I am just grateful for my husband who chose me! I am grateful for my kids and the whole rest of our family. I am grateful for friends and that our apartment didn't flood very much during the typhoon. Don't get me wrong though...there are tough days.
One day in particular a couple of weeks ago I was giving the kids baths (which are far and few between because have you ever bathed 3 kids by yourself?) So I decided to condense and give all the kids a bath at the same time. HUGE mistake. By the end Caleb had cracked chunks out of his two front teeth and was screaming bloody murder at the same moment in which L got soap in her eyes and proceeded to scream bloody murder. Then Connor chose that moment to flip one wash cloth in each hand as fast as he could flinging water ALL over me, his siblings and the bathroom. I yelled, "This is why there are supposed to be two parents!" as I attempted to comfort Caleb, look for his teeth pieces and wash L's eyes out who also needed comforting. This is not for the faint of heart!
I am so blessed with the kids God has blessed us with and I am humbled by the fact that M chose me to be the one who he put faith for his family in. Not the spiritual faith, but faith that I can keep the home going, the kids happy and take care of him anyway in which he needs from afar. I love you M!
I know my mother thinks I am insane to have brought a cat into our home...and she is probably not the only one. Did I really need another creature to clean up after? How much puke and poop do I really want to be spend my time cleaning up? However, if you were here and had seen the response of the kids to the cat in the last week, you would know instantly why the kids needed a cat! First, this is the best cat we could have ever prayed for! He is sweet and gentle! He doesn't tear up furniture. He only meows when one of the kids gets too close (and by too close, I mean twice I have gotten up to respond to the pitiful meowing and Caleb is sitting on top of the cat smiling). He has not once pulled out his claws, scratched a kid, hissed or been mean! I am spending 90% of my time trying to protect the cat from the kids, but he is so gentle. L has been so sweet and gentle since the cat came home. She is more respectful and tries to protect the cat as much as a 3 year old can. Connor babbles all day now, mostly about the cat. He smiles and loves interacting with Beastie. If someone new comes into the house, he is fine interacting with the new person because they can play with the cat together. Caleb loves to "tell" me stories about the cat. He is constantly gesturing towards the cat and talking up a storm. He tells me all about what the cat is doing. This was the best decision for the kids!!! Hopefully the cat likes us as much as we love him. I suspect he does because I went to bed last night and while checking on L, the cat was curled right against her fast asleep. I think Beastie's foster mama made a purfect match. (Sorry, couldn't resist.).
Time to sing off as Beastie is trying to help me type.
L woke me up the other morning with a smile. She told me that she had slept wonderfully because of her dreams. She was dreaming of when daddy gets home! That was a beautiful way to greet the day!
The next morning I awoke to giggles. Beastie was giving L her kisses and she was giggling from the joy of her kitty kisses. I am so blessed to have 3 amazing kiddos!
Not too much is going on here. With the web page being updated frequently, I don't have much to tell you on here. I am just grateful for my husband who chose me! I am grateful for my kids and the whole rest of our family. I am grateful for friends and that our apartment didn't flood very much during the typhoon. Don't get me wrong though...there are tough days.
One day in particular a couple of weeks ago I was giving the kids baths (which are far and few between because have you ever bathed 3 kids by yourself?) So I decided to condense and give all the kids a bath at the same time. HUGE mistake. By the end Caleb had cracked chunks out of his two front teeth and was screaming bloody murder at the same moment in which L got soap in her eyes and proceeded to scream bloody murder. Then Connor chose that moment to flip one wash cloth in each hand as fast as he could flinging water ALL over me, his siblings and the bathroom. I yelled, "This is why there are supposed to be two parents!" as I attempted to comfort Caleb, look for his teeth pieces and wash L's eyes out who also needed comforting. This is not for the faint of heart!
I am so blessed with the kids God has blessed us with and I am humbled by the fact that M chose me to be the one who he put faith for his family in. Not the spiritual faith, but faith that I can keep the home going, the kids happy and take care of him anyway in which he needs from afar. I love you M!
I know my mother thinks I am insane to have brought a cat into our home...and she is probably not the only one. Did I really need another creature to clean up after? How much puke and poop do I really want to be spend my time cleaning up? However, if you were here and had seen the response of the kids to the cat in the last week, you would know instantly why the kids needed a cat! First, this is the best cat we could have ever prayed for! He is sweet and gentle! He doesn't tear up furniture. He only meows when one of the kids gets too close (and by too close, I mean twice I have gotten up to respond to the pitiful meowing and Caleb is sitting on top of the cat smiling). He has not once pulled out his claws, scratched a kid, hissed or been mean! I am spending 90% of my time trying to protect the cat from the kids, but he is so gentle. L has been so sweet and gentle since the cat came home. She is more respectful and tries to protect the cat as much as a 3 year old can. Connor babbles all day now, mostly about the cat. He smiles and loves interacting with Beastie. If someone new comes into the house, he is fine interacting with the new person because they can play with the cat together. Caleb loves to "tell" me stories about the cat. He is constantly gesturing towards the cat and talking up a storm. He tells me all about what the cat is doing. This was the best decision for the kids!!! Hopefully the cat likes us as much as we love him. I suspect he does because I went to bed last night and while checking on L, the cat was curled right against her fast asleep. I think Beastie's foster mama made a purfect match. (Sorry, couldn't resist.).
Time to sing off as Beastie is trying to help me type.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Developmental Delay
An update on my little men...
Connor is being identified as developmentally delayed. For those who ask, this does not mean he is retarded. He has some areas where he is delayed due to being a preemie, a twin, a boy, having an older sister who "helps" and it looks like he has some sensory integration problems. Which according to medical dictionary means:
Connor is being identified as developmentally delayed. For those who ask, this does not mean he is retarded. He has some areas where he is delayed due to being a preemie, a twin, a boy, having an older sister who "helps" and it looks like he has some sensory integration problems. Which according to medical dictionary means:
Definition
Sensory integration disorder or dysfunction (SID) is a neurological disorder that results from the brain's inability to integrate certain information received from the body's five basic sensory systems. These sensory systems are responsible for detecting sights, sounds, smell, tastes, temperatures, pain, and the position and movements of the body. The brain then forms a combined picture of this information in order for the body to make sense of its surroundings and react to them appropriately. The ongoing relationship between behavior and brain functioning is called sensory integration (SI), a theory that was first pioneered by A. Jean Ayres, Ph.D., OTR in the 1960s.
He has some language delays which contributes to the biting and screeching that he uses instead of words and he has some fine motor (think small muscle) delays. He is also as stubborn as a mule, he wants to do what he wants to do and everyone else better leave him alone. He also appears to have some perfectionist tendencies...so he refuses to complete activities until he can do them perfectly...which makes him appear to be more delayed than he really is. All these separate issues combine to what we call developmentally delayed.
There is no doubt in my mind that he will catch up and probably by the age of 3 will no longer need any services at all which is wonderful. 25 years ago he would have not even been diagnosed with anything other than a being little quirky.
Because the sensory issues, language delay and behaviors (screaming/biting) are interfering with his overall development; he will be receiving Occupational Therapy 2x's/month, a Special Educator 2x's/month and a Speech Therapist probably 2x's/month starting in September.
I hope this is clearly explained for our family what is going on with Connor. If you have any questions definitely feel free to ask! I tend to use the phrases and language of the field just because I was in special education for so long, so sometimes it is hard for me to remember to clarify for people unfamiliar with the way we speak about the field.
Please pray for me...as I am making all these decisions about how to best serve Connor, I am struggling. I struggle with knowing what exactly is the best thing; trying not to be overconfident because this is my field and then having no confidence because it is so different with your own child. I feel lost because my parenting partner is not here to bounce/discuss ideas on how to best help Connor. If M was choosing to be away from our family it would be different, I would just take care of everything. But because he will be back, and he stays involved as the daddy, I want to make sure that the decisions I make are really best for Connor and that M agrees. This has been a very hard week and I can't explain my struggles other than I am not concerned about Connor, but I am concerned about how I am parenting while temporarily parenting alone.
Last night M was able to call and we had the chance to discuss some of this. He was so supportive and wonderful!!! But like my mom says, mother's guilt never goes away. I think most moms do go to bed wondering if they are doing "it" right. I have to give this to GOD and know that he placed Connor in my life because I know what to do for him! I always knew I would have a special needs child...so I have to have confidence that I am best for Connor because this is how God planned it! I am also so thankful that Connor doesn't appear to have a life-long disability. He is delayed right now, but there is no doubt among his team that he will eventually catch up. So while we will have an intense year or two of therapy and support, I am so thankful that he doesn't have Autism, Down's, or any other life-long learning difference.
Caleb is delayed, but not enough to qualify for services. No shock because this is life with preemies...keep your baby in the uterus as long as you can, not that you have much control, but the preemie things continues to be a difficult. So no services for Caleb, but he will continue to be monitored.
Both boys do have fluid on their ears and can hear face to face at about 3 feet. Anything farther than that and they will have trouble hearing. The boys will be monitored about every 4 weeks to make sure the fluid is not causing ear damage or greatly impacting their hearing. The boys will continued to be monitored just to make sure we are staying on top of all the concerns. So glad to have most of the support we need over here.
Alright, the brain vomit is slowing for now. Thanks for encouraging us on this journey!
Please pray for me...as I am making all these decisions about how to best serve Connor, I am struggling. I struggle with knowing what exactly is the best thing; trying not to be overconfident because this is my field and then having no confidence because it is so different with your own child. I feel lost because my parenting partner is not here to bounce/discuss ideas on how to best help Connor. If M was choosing to be away from our family it would be different, I would just take care of everything. But because he will be back, and he stays involved as the daddy, I want to make sure that the decisions I make are really best for Connor and that M agrees. This has been a very hard week and I can't explain my struggles other than I am not concerned about Connor, but I am concerned about how I am parenting while temporarily parenting alone.
Last night M was able to call and we had the chance to discuss some of this. He was so supportive and wonderful!!! But like my mom says, mother's guilt never goes away. I think most moms do go to bed wondering if they are doing "it" right. I have to give this to GOD and know that he placed Connor in my life because I know what to do for him! I always knew I would have a special needs child...so I have to have confidence that I am best for Connor because this is how God planned it! I am also so thankful that Connor doesn't appear to have a life-long disability. He is delayed right now, but there is no doubt among his team that he will eventually catch up. So while we will have an intense year or two of therapy and support, I am so thankful that he doesn't have Autism, Down's, or any other life-long learning difference.
Caleb is delayed, but not enough to qualify for services. No shock because this is life with preemies...keep your baby in the uterus as long as you can, not that you have much control, but the preemie things continues to be a difficult. So no services for Caleb, but he will continue to be monitored.
Both boys do have fluid on their ears and can hear face to face at about 3 feet. Anything farther than that and they will have trouble hearing. The boys will be monitored about every 4 weeks to make sure the fluid is not causing ear damage or greatly impacting their hearing. The boys will continued to be monitored just to make sure we are staying on top of all the concerns. So glad to have most of the support we need over here.
Alright, the brain vomit is slowing for now. Thanks for encouraging us on this journey!
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Old Hymns
The churches I have gone to since graduating high school sing newer contemporary songs. Do you ever miss the old hymns? I have been! Since having kids, I would love to be at a church that at least occasionally sang all the old hymns. I want my kids to have that same feeling of comfort I have when hearing the old music. What is you favorite old hymn? Mine is Sing and Be Happy (at least I think that is the name) and the one that starts with "There is beyond the azure blue..."
I would love to hear your favorite to bring up fond memories!
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Not killing time anymore
About a year ago a friend who has two boys and then identical twin girls wrote that she had not really ever been excited about being a stay-at-home-mom until then. I so related to this feeling. She was then finally at a point where she was now enjoying her kids, liking being with them and excited about what each day would bring. I was not relating to that feeling. However, I can say that we have reached that point. I used to think of being at home as a time killer until we could settle and the kids were older. I would stay at home because it was easier and best for our family. But I was in the meantime aching to be back in a classroom. I missed the new year smell, the progress of kids who may not be making such progress with others, the thrill of a child's success. I can honestly say, since January, life has been getting better and better. Of course there are frustrating days, but who doesn't have those.
This week with 3 sick kids I realized I am no longer just killing time until I can go back to work. Being able to snuggle with each kid as he/she was sick was priceless. I enjoyed being able to hold them and get them what they needed from a mother's heart. I couldn't imagine my babies even feeling a little crummy and sending them off because I couldn't afford to miss another day of work. I am grateful we are not having to worry about me missing work and a paycheck. I am so grateful for the way our lives have unfolded and for the amazing support of our friends and family.
M and I worked very hard pre-kids setting us up to be in a place where we could afford for me to stay home. I am now so grateful we had a plan and by the grace of God were able to accomplish that plan. We may not be able to go on weekend trips all over Asia, but my kids have mommy here each day.
I also could not imagine being a working mother. How do you get errands done, laundry done, kids' activities, homework, church, etc. How do you do it all and still love on your kids and be there for your kids? You are quite extraordinary women to be able to do it all!
A toast to all mothers --- those who work outside the home, those who stay at home, those who have babies in Heaven, those who have born children or welcomed a child into your home not from your flesh, those who do it alone and those who have a partner, those who can't be with their children and those who reach out in motherly ways to the people around you. We are all in this together
I know some people are very sensitive about this topic. I am not writing this to put down a different way of life for anyone else's family. Each family has to do what is best for their family. If you know me at all, you know I advocate what is best for the family! With M's long work hours, gone for weeks and months at a time, and having to be able to up and go with a moment's notice, there is no other choice for our family. This is best for our family. I have to be the rock that our kids rely on and the person who will remain constant. Leaving no room for work -- and I am recently finding myself so grateful for this! So don't get all flustered and offended. I am only expressing my appreciation for our life. That doesn't mean I don't value you and your life too.
Have a wonderful weekend!
PS - as always stupid comments will be deleted. Caring, loving, supportive and encouraging-to-all-mothers comments welcome!
This week with 3 sick kids I realized I am no longer just killing time until I can go back to work. Being able to snuggle with each kid as he/she was sick was priceless. I enjoyed being able to hold them and get them what they needed from a mother's heart. I couldn't imagine my babies even feeling a little crummy and sending them off because I couldn't afford to miss another day of work. I am grateful we are not having to worry about me missing work and a paycheck. I am so grateful for the way our lives have unfolded and for the amazing support of our friends and family.
M and I worked very hard pre-kids setting us up to be in a place where we could afford for me to stay home. I am now so grateful we had a plan and by the grace of God were able to accomplish that plan. We may not be able to go on weekend trips all over Asia, but my kids have mommy here each day.
I also could not imagine being a working mother. How do you get errands done, laundry done, kids' activities, homework, church, etc. How do you do it all and still love on your kids and be there for your kids? You are quite extraordinary women to be able to do it all!
A toast to all mothers --- those who work outside the home, those who stay at home, those who have babies in Heaven, those who have born children or welcomed a child into your home not from your flesh, those who do it alone and those who have a partner, those who can't be with their children and those who reach out in motherly ways to the people around you. We are all in this together
I know some people are very sensitive about this topic. I am not writing this to put down a different way of life for anyone else's family. Each family has to do what is best for their family. If you know me at all, you know I advocate what is best for the family! With M's long work hours, gone for weeks and months at a time, and having to be able to up and go with a moment's notice, there is no other choice for our family. This is best for our family. I have to be the rock that our kids rely on and the person who will remain constant. Leaving no room for work -- and I am recently finding myself so grateful for this! So don't get all flustered and offended. I am only expressing my appreciation for our life. That doesn't mean I don't value you and your life too.
Have a wonderful weekend!
PS - as always stupid comments will be deleted. Caring, loving, supportive and encouraging-to-all-mothers comments welcome!
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Early Intervention -- Again
Here we go again. Almost one year exactly. Today the boys had their 15 month check up (month and 1/2 late with mommy of the year award going to B). The Dr. is concerned that the boys are only using about 4 words. Connor is displaying a few more red flags so EDIS (Early Intervention) will be contacting us shortly. We'll go through the referral and eligibility process again. While I am certain that the boys are only delayed and will eventually catch up just as they have since they were born, if we can get services, we will use them. Being twin, males, preemies, and an older sister who speaks A LOT well; these are many of the factors we consider when deciding if a child truly has a disability or just somewhat delayed. We'll keep you updated. Neither M or I are too concerned and are looking forward to the day very soon when 3 kids are jabbering my ear off.
They both do have terrible colds with ear infections. They are snotty nosed and just plain miserable. So please do say a prayer that I have 110% patience with the whining, fussiness and overall unhappy boys.
L just got home from a friend's house and looked off. She now has a 102.1 temp. I don't want the family she was with to get sick. Please pray for all 3 sick kids and that Mama doesn't get sick too!
Please also pray for Connor. He is now in the 1% for weight. We are adding some supplements to his diet to try and get some weight on him. He is way too tiny and needs to get some meat on his bones. Don't I wish I had that problem ;). Thanks you all!!!!
They both do have terrible colds with ear infections. They are snotty nosed and just plain miserable. So please do say a prayer that I have 110% patience with the whining, fussiness and overall unhappy boys.
L just got home from a friend's house and looked off. She now has a 102.1 temp. I don't want the family she was with to get sick. Please pray for all 3 sick kids and that Mama doesn't get sick too!
Please also pray for Connor. He is now in the 1% for weight. We are adding some supplements to his diet to try and get some weight on him. He is way too tiny and needs to get some meat on his bones. Don't I wish I had that problem ;). Thanks you all!!!!
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Children's Benadryl -- Help PLEASE!
There are only 3 OTC drugs I can give to my babies. We can no longer get ANY of the only 3 meds for my children at the Commissary or the Exchange. Can you please help?
Back in Nov. I stocked up on Motrin and Tylenol which are not available. However, I can no longer get Childrens' Benadryl. Amazon will not ship Childrens' Benadryl to us. Can you please help us? I will reimburse you when you let me know how much you have spent and postage. I would REALLY appreciate being able to get this item for my snotty nosed babies. Thank you to you who respond!! Do you have any idea how miserable little ones can be without meds? God Bless pioneer women who had no meds for their tykes. I am just not willing to go without when it is available.
Thank you for your help and support!
Back in Nov. I stocked up on Motrin and Tylenol which are not available. However, I can no longer get Childrens' Benadryl. Amazon will not ship Childrens' Benadryl to us. Can you please help us? I will reimburse you when you let me know how much you have spent and postage. I would REALLY appreciate being able to get this item for my snotty nosed babies. Thank you to you who respond!! Do you have any idea how miserable little ones can be without meds? God Bless pioneer women who had no meds for their tykes. I am just not willing to go without when it is available.
Thank you for your help and support!
8 years later
How did I know M was "the one" for all the rest of my life?
He prays for us.
He prays for our family.
He is a steady rock of faith.
He can be counted on for big and little things.
He overcomes struggle with God and determination.
He is wise.
When he makes a decision, he sticks to it.
He is truthful with grace ind integrity.
What he loves about the Marine Corps. is Semper Fidilis. Which he lives out in every moment.
He loves his family.
He is dedicated to becoming a better man each day.
He continues to learn when he can.
He can interact and connect in a way with Lexi which guides her to becoming a Christ-centered woman.
Thank you dear God for bringing us together. Thank you dear God for the life that we have and the blessings and trials you have provided. Thank you for M!
He prays for us.
He prays for our family.
He is a steady rock of faith.
He can be counted on for big and little things.
He overcomes struggle with God and determination.
He is wise.
When he makes a decision, he sticks to it.
He is truthful with grace ind integrity.
What he loves about the Marine Corps. is Semper Fidilis. Which he lives out in every moment.
He loves his family.
He is dedicated to becoming a better man each day.
He continues to learn when he can.
He can interact and connect in a way with Lexi which guides her to becoming a Christ-centered woman.
Thank you dear God for bringing us together. Thank you dear God for the life that we have and the blessings and trials you have provided. Thank you for M!
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
What?
This email has been cracking me up for 2 days...hope you enjoy! Don't get all churchy on me, sometimes you just need a good laugh.
Employer's response:
Dear Bryan ,
It's OK honey, we've got spell check.
See you Monday.
Resimay
To hoom it mae cunsern,
I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.
I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..
I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person,
Pepole really seam to respond
to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.
I no my spelling is not to good but fi nd that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.
My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,
I can start emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.
hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.
Sinseerly,
BRYAN
To hoom it mae cunsern,
I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.
I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..
I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person,
Pepole really seam to respond
to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.
I no my spelling is not to good but fi nd that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.
My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,
I can start emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.
hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.
Sinseerly,
BRYAN
PS : Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a pickture of me.
Employer's response:
Dear Bryan ,
It's OK honey, we've got spell check.
See you Monday.
Monday, June 27, 2011
Appreciative
Thank you so much to everyone who is leaving comments, emails and encouraging words. We are one month into our deployment and we feel so loved. I am so excited to check Facebook each day to see who is saying something kind. Thank you for you love, support and prayers!
My mother-in-laws
You probably know that I am blessed to have two mother-in-laws. Between both of them we are blessed to have love, support and prayers. One specific blessing of late has been from M's biological mother, sending me "Daily Words of Encouragement" emails. They are so touching. I just opened up today's email and am still sitting here crying. I was deeply moved that she would think this of me and our family. She called me her lion. Though I am not nearly as tough as the Army wives who have to go 14 months with their husbands gone! Thank you for your love and support!
Here is the email posted...
The good Lord was creating a model for military wives and was into his sixth day of overtime when an angel appeared. She said, "Lord, you seem to be having a lot of trouble with this one. What's wrong with the standard model? The Lord replied, "Have you seen the specs on this order?" She has to be completely independent, possess the qualities of both father and mother. Be a perfect hostess to four to 40 with an hour's notice, run on black coffee, handle every emergency imaginable without a manual, be able to carry on cheerfully, even if she is pregnant and has the flu, and she must be willing to move to a new location 10 times in 17 years. And oh, yes, she must have six pairs of hands. The angel shook her head. "Six pairs of hands?" No way.
"The Lord continued, “Don't worry, we will make the other military wives to help her. And we will give her an unusually strong heart so it can swell with pride in her husband’s achievements, sustain the pain of separations, beat soundly when it is overworked and tired, and be large enough to say, "I understand," when she doesn't, and say, "I love you' regardless." "Lord," said the angel, touching his arm gently, "Go to bed and get some rest. You can finish this tomorrow. "I can't stop now," the Lord said. "I am so close to creating something unique." Already this model heals her when sick, can put up with six unexpected guests for the weekend, wave good-bye to her husband from a pier, a runway or depot, and understand why it's important that he leave." The angel circled the model of the military wife, looked closely and sighed, "It looks fine, but it's too soft." She might look soft,” replied the Lord. "But she has the strength of a lion. You would not believe what she can endure."
Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the Lord’s creation. "There's a leak," she announced. "Something is wrong with the construction. I am not surprised that it has cracked. You are trying to put too much into this. "
The Lord appeared offended at the angel’s lack of confidence. "What you see is not a leak", he said, "It’s a tear." "A tear? What is it there for?", asked the angel. The Lord replied, "It’s for joy, sadness, pain, disappointment, loneliness, pride and a dedication to all the values that she and her husband hold dear." "You are a genius!" exclaimed the angel.
The Lord looked puzzled and replied, "I didn’t put it there".
Sunday, June 19, 2011
One of those not so fun days.
This was not my favorite day ever. Missing the daddy to my kids, Caleb tracking poop all through the house, dinner 1/2 burning because I was attempting to clean up poop and L going now on 4 weeks of major pee accidents. Today was definitely a day of several tears.
This would be where encouraging thoughts come pouring in...:)
Have a Happy Father's day all you over in America.
This would be where encouraging thoughts come pouring in...:)
Have a Happy Father's day all you over in America.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Twins
I was thinking today about how so many of the questions I would get while pregnant and during the boys' first year drove me crazy. Now that we are in the second year the questions don't bother me even close to the annoyance level of last year. Maybe because I now get a full night's sleep most of the time? Maybe because I am not completely overwhelmed by two parasitic babies? Or maybe just because I have gotten used to having twins? Whatever the reason I am not nearly so likely to bite one's head off.
The question we get most frequently these days is, "Are they twins?" But this question is a true question as opposed to asking a very obviously known answer. You remember my favorite responses..."Nope, I just like to collect babies" or "no, I just found this one the other day" or my favorite of all time, "yes, but they have different fathers." Now this question is no longer someone asking a question they already know the answer to. People are now legitimately trying to figure out if the boys are twins. The question, "Are they twins" is usually immediately followed up in the same breath by, "Are they Irish twins." I thought that you would get a kick out of my new answer to these two questions.
Right away I respond with, "We are not dumb enough to have Irish twins unless you have Irish twins then you are not dumb. They are regular twins." Most people laugh and then say the usual about how much the boys don't look alike.
I suppose part of the reason this Irish twin question or even the twin question doesn't bother me much anymore is that the boys really are so different. Caleb is several inches taller and about 2 pounds heavier. They really don't even look related. Without the obviousness of having two babies the same size, I am not nearly as annoyed as I once was. Though this really is probably just due to my sleep-full nights.
My boys are growing and laughing. They giggle with each other, with big sister, and with mommy. They are each saying a handful of words. Connor almost runs all over while Caleb would still much rather stick close. Though since daddy left Connor has become much more needy and Caleb more independent. We had expected this to happen at some point because they have both repeatedly switched roles over the last 16 months. Caleb is pointing to things he wants and imitates almost every word said. Both boys are picking up sign language like sponges (while sister is speaking lots in Japanese). Connor is beginning to point to things around his environment. Caleb growls for a lion and Connor loves to say "uh oh".
All 3 kids are going to the Child Development Center on base (CDC) and they appear to love it! There is a job opening at the CDC that would be perfect...but I need to stay home with my kids right now. I will be working for many many more years, but this time will go so quickly I don't want to miss it!
L is taking swim lessons next week and about to start gymnastics. She is enjoying staying busy and seems to be better behaved when she has lots to do and places to go.
Mama is missing daddy, but doing well. I am enjoying my evenings of quiet and not much cooking.
Have a wonderfully wonderful day! Enjoy your weekend.
The question we get most frequently these days is, "Are they twins?" But this question is a true question as opposed to asking a very obviously known answer. You remember my favorite responses..."Nope, I just like to collect babies" or "no, I just found this one the other day" or my favorite of all time, "yes, but they have different fathers." Now this question is no longer someone asking a question they already know the answer to. People are now legitimately trying to figure out if the boys are twins. The question, "Are they twins" is usually immediately followed up in the same breath by, "Are they Irish twins." I thought that you would get a kick out of my new answer to these two questions.
Right away I respond with, "We are not dumb enough to have Irish twins unless you have Irish twins then you are not dumb. They are regular twins." Most people laugh and then say the usual about how much the boys don't look alike.
I suppose part of the reason this Irish twin question or even the twin question doesn't bother me much anymore is that the boys really are so different. Caleb is several inches taller and about 2 pounds heavier. They really don't even look related. Without the obviousness of having two babies the same size, I am not nearly as annoyed as I once was. Though this really is probably just due to my sleep-full nights.
My boys are growing and laughing. They giggle with each other, with big sister, and with mommy. They are each saying a handful of words. Connor almost runs all over while Caleb would still much rather stick close. Though since daddy left Connor has become much more needy and Caleb more independent. We had expected this to happen at some point because they have both repeatedly switched roles over the last 16 months. Caleb is pointing to things he wants and imitates almost every word said. Both boys are picking up sign language like sponges (while sister is speaking lots in Japanese). Connor is beginning to point to things around his environment. Caleb growls for a lion and Connor loves to say "uh oh".
All 3 kids are going to the Child Development Center on base (CDC) and they appear to love it! There is a job opening at the CDC that would be perfect...but I need to stay home with my kids right now. I will be working for many many more years, but this time will go so quickly I don't want to miss it!
L is taking swim lessons next week and about to start gymnastics. She is enjoying staying busy and seems to be better behaved when she has lots to do and places to go.
Mama is missing daddy, but doing well. I am enjoying my evenings of quiet and not much cooking.
Have a wonderfully wonderful day! Enjoy your weekend.
Chipper -- because the end is in sight
If you know me even a little bit, you know that I am very expressive...joy and anger. Happiness and sadness. Excitement and frustration. So please don't laugh when you read the next part...or at least don't let me hear you laughing.
Have you seen the movie CARS? You know, Lightening McQueen and all that? In the 3 years that I have had children, I had yet to actually sit down and watch the movie. The other night I specifically sat down and watched the movie with L. (I am usually trying to get something done while she watches a movie). So I sit and watch the ending with her for the first time.
Holy smokes I did not see this coming. I started crying when McQueen pushed the old race car across the finish line. I know I know. But I am, at my heart, a special education teacher -- so anything remotely resembling helping the underdog gets me going. I did realize then though how much this week has meant to me. This week M finally gets to his destination and the clock starts ticking. I think the kids' movie just triggered the tears.
You see, when I saw that scene in the movie, it made me think of the next time I know I my heart will be joyful -- which is when my arms are around my husband's neck again. So then I was really crying thinking of how happy I'll be when he comes home! How do you explain tears of joy to a 3-year old? She started getting upset and I tried to explain that I was crying out of joy. When I think of daddy coming home I am just overwhelmed with love, joy, excitement...she didn't get it. After a couple of minutes she was distracted by the movie and let it go.
Though it has been fun to talk with her about what we will do when daddy gets home. We'll make posters, have balloons, streamers and jump up and down. We can stay excited because we know how wonderful it will be to have the man of the house, the daddy, the husband, the lover, the best friend, the rock of this home back with us. We love you M! You mean the world to the 4 of us! Let the countdown begin!
Just in case you are as unobservant as I am, M's address is posted to the right. Please don't send chocolate (it melts and he doesn't like it anyway).
A few of the things he likes:
Swedish fish
Sour Patch kids
Red licorice
Cool Ranch Doritoes
Combos
Beef Jerkey
Desk Games -- desk football, desk bowling, you know dollar store junk
Ritz crackers
Cheezits
Chocolate chip cookies
Brownies
Military books to read
Historical fiction and non-fiction
Movies
Pictures of close friends and family
Runner and Mac magazines
AAFES Gift Cards (can get online for military stores) Its where we do most of our shopping
when overseas
Hope this helps give you ideas on how to encourage and support M if you feel so inclined.
Here's to the countdown beginning!!!!!
Have you seen the movie CARS? You know, Lightening McQueen and all that? In the 3 years that I have had children, I had yet to actually sit down and watch the movie. The other night I specifically sat down and watched the movie with L. (I am usually trying to get something done while she watches a movie). So I sit and watch the ending with her for the first time.
Holy smokes I did not see this coming. I started crying when McQueen pushed the old race car across the finish line. I know I know. But I am, at my heart, a special education teacher -- so anything remotely resembling helping the underdog gets me going. I did realize then though how much this week has meant to me. This week M finally gets to his destination and the clock starts ticking. I think the kids' movie just triggered the tears.
You see, when I saw that scene in the movie, it made me think of the next time I know I my heart will be joyful -- which is when my arms are around my husband's neck again. So then I was really crying thinking of how happy I'll be when he comes home! How do you explain tears of joy to a 3-year old? She started getting upset and I tried to explain that I was crying out of joy. When I think of daddy coming home I am just overwhelmed with love, joy, excitement...she didn't get it. After a couple of minutes she was distracted by the movie and let it go.
Though it has been fun to talk with her about what we will do when daddy gets home. We'll make posters, have balloons, streamers and jump up and down. We can stay excited because we know how wonderful it will be to have the man of the house, the daddy, the husband, the lover, the best friend, the rock of this home back with us. We love you M! You mean the world to the 4 of us! Let the countdown begin!
Just in case you are as unobservant as I am, M's address is posted to the right. Please don't send chocolate (it melts and he doesn't like it anyway).
A few of the things he likes:
Swedish fish
Sour Patch kids
Red licorice
Cool Ranch Doritoes
Combos
Beef Jerkey
Desk Games -- desk football, desk bowling, you know dollar store junk
Ritz crackers
Cheezits
Chocolate chip cookies
Brownies
Military books to read
Historical fiction and non-fiction
Movies
Pictures of close friends and family
Runner and Mac magazines
AAFES Gift Cards (can get online for military stores) Its where we do most of our shopping
when overseas
Hope this helps give you ideas on how to encourage and support M if you feel so inclined.
Here's to the countdown beginning!!!!!
Monday, June 13, 2011
In a Groove?
We may have gotten into a groove. Though to say this out loud may just jinx us...
On Sunday we actually made it to church, though I am now certain that for the next 6 months I will not be going anywhere that requires me to wear makeup. The boys were sitting on the floor next to me screaming the whole time I was attempting to apply makeup. So, no makeup Sundays it will be from now on.
We even made it to the 9:30 service which is a feat when M is home, let alone while he is gone! We then had lunch at Subway and shopped for a few grocery items. I felt successful when we got into the car and everyone was still smiling! Leading me to the conclusion that we seemed to have hit our groove.
The boys no longer wake up at all times of the night which they did the first week and 1/2. No one is currently sick (knock on wood) and I get 10 hours a week to myself! I think the kids have adjusted to having daddy gone. This was proven by L getting a sad pitiful face, sniffing twice and announcing that she was, "sad daddy was gone and therefore needed some TV." I knew she was definitely adjusted when she was attempting tomanipulate convince in that way!!!
Now that I have the logistics down of doing this on my own, we should fly from here on out right?
Well, maybe we will make it after all. Maybe not with flying colors or it may not be a piece of cake. But we can do this!!!
I truly appreciate every note, card, comment and word of encouragement! Thank you for sending special little gifts and sweet books to read. Thank you especially for your prayers!!!
On Sunday we actually made it to church, though I am now certain that for the next 6 months I will not be going anywhere that requires me to wear makeup. The boys were sitting on the floor next to me screaming the whole time I was attempting to apply makeup. So, no makeup Sundays it will be from now on.
We even made it to the 9:30 service which is a feat when M is home, let alone while he is gone! We then had lunch at Subway and shopped for a few grocery items. I felt successful when we got into the car and everyone was still smiling! Leading me to the conclusion that we seemed to have hit our groove.
The boys no longer wake up at all times of the night which they did the first week and 1/2. No one is currently sick (knock on wood) and I get 10 hours a week to myself! I think the kids have adjusted to having daddy gone. This was proven by L getting a sad pitiful face, sniffing twice and announcing that she was, "sad daddy was gone and therefore needed some TV." I knew she was definitely adjusted when she was attempting to
Now that I have the logistics down of doing this on my own, we should fly from here on out right?
Well, maybe we will make it after all. Maybe not with flying colors or it may not be a piece of cake. But we can do this!!!
I truly appreciate every note, card, comment and word of encouragement! Thank you for sending special little gifts and sweet books to read. Thank you especially for your prayers!!!
Private
Yeah, we never went private. way too much work for this mama to enter in all the emails. maybe we will someday...
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Have to look for more blessings...
This deployment is not going to be my favorite time in life, I can see that already. Last week 3 of the 4 of us were knocked out with a stomach bug. Then L had a trip to the ER for a UTI. Today I threw my back out and on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being most pailful) it was an 8 at the time of the injury. M has not had an easy time either. His paperwork has been delayed and messed up causing more stress for him. His computer died and he had to buy a new one and several of his other electronics died as well.
So to remember that all is not hard, here are a few blessings...
When M and I married he had several preferences; but with him gone I get to use my old detergent and eat the frozen pizza I used until 8 years ago. I haven't "sacrificed" my preferences, they just weren't big deals to give up. Now I get to enjoy a few of the simple things like my favorite frozen pizza.
I am getting to watch lots of episodes of Bones. I really like that show.
Friends are cooking for us several times per week which is AWESOME!
M has gotten to run into several friends at his current location which has been good for him.
He and my brother are hanging out together so that's fun.
Asking for help is no longer an issue for me. Which would I rather have -- mommy stressed out because I want to do everything on my own, or a little embarrassment at having to ask for help. I will pass on the extra stress.
So since this has been a hard ten days already, I had to stop and count my blessings.
Please pray for us!
So to remember that all is not hard, here are a few blessings...
When M and I married he had several preferences; but with him gone I get to use my old detergent and eat the frozen pizza I used until 8 years ago. I haven't "sacrificed" my preferences, they just weren't big deals to give up. Now I get to enjoy a few of the simple things like my favorite frozen pizza.
I am getting to watch lots of episodes of Bones. I really like that show.
Friends are cooking for us several times per week which is AWESOME!
M has gotten to run into several friends at his current location which has been good for him.
He and my brother are hanging out together so that's fun.
Asking for help is no longer an issue for me. Which would I rather have -- mommy stressed out because I want to do everything on my own, or a little embarrassment at having to ask for help. I will pass on the extra stress.
So since this has been a hard ten days already, I had to stop and count my blessings.
Please pray for us!
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Blessings
Just a few of the blessings we will enjoy while daddy is gone....
Mommy gets to take up the WHOLE bed without worry of pushing M out of bed. This is a nightly frustration for him.
This trip away is great for daddy's career.
We will definitely be relying on the body of Christ, that is always good for the soul.
Separations make the heart grow fonder right? The Marine Corps. is definitely skilled at keeping up spice and excitement in the marriage.
We have a trip to Australia to look forward to when daddy gets back. L is SOOOOOO excited about going to visit grandma and grandpa in Australia. These children have more stamps in their passport than most adults!
Mama is independent so we should be able to survive just fine. The thriving part is what we are shooting for.
Daddy gets to know how much we love and appreciate him! We will most certainly be letting him know more than usual how much love in our hearts we have for him. Between notes, letters, cards, emails, and FB, he will know we are thinking of him.
Since my goal is to upload pics each day so daddy can see what the kiddos are up to, all the grandmas get to have more frequent pics of the kids as well.
The $$$ is definitely alright. We will hopefully be able to set aside a good amount to help towards buying a house when we get back to the states.
The boys are not old enough to really miss daddy. They absolutely know something is up and will be asking for him, but L is the one comprehending. So the boys adjustment should be easier.
I am so grateful that today's deployments are not like they were in WW II. Then guys were gone for years and you never really knew where they were or what they were doing. You might get a letter, but it would months upon months old. Now we have FB, email and SKYPE. We have video equipment and recordings. The deployments are so much shorter! So thankful to be a military family now rather than 60 years ago!
M got few extra uniform supplies at no cost to our family...that was a bonus. Since Officers don't get a uniform allowance and the uniforms are a bit expensive, free to our family is always good.
L and Connor are very very very independent children. They need no one and no body. That personality will make the transition easier. As long as Caleb has mama, he is fine.
10 hours per week of free-to-our-family child care at the Child Development Center. I am so grateful to have a bit of free childcare! That means I will have time to grocery shop and run errands all by myself!!!
The friends we have here in Okinawa are amazing!
Just a few of the good things to be thankful for! Have a good day!
Mommy gets to take up the WHOLE bed without worry of pushing M out of bed. This is a nightly frustration for him.
This trip away is great for daddy's career.
We will definitely be relying on the body of Christ, that is always good for the soul.
Separations make the heart grow fonder right? The Marine Corps. is definitely skilled at keeping up spice and excitement in the marriage.
We have a trip to Australia to look forward to when daddy gets back. L is SOOOOOO excited about going to visit grandma and grandpa in Australia. These children have more stamps in their passport than most adults!
Mama is independent so we should be able to survive just fine. The thriving part is what we are shooting for.
Daddy gets to know how much we love and appreciate him! We will most certainly be letting him know more than usual how much love in our hearts we have for him. Between notes, letters, cards, emails, and FB, he will know we are thinking of him.
Since my goal is to upload pics each day so daddy can see what the kiddos are up to, all the grandmas get to have more frequent pics of the kids as well.
The $$$ is definitely alright. We will hopefully be able to set aside a good amount to help towards buying a house when we get back to the states.
The boys are not old enough to really miss daddy. They absolutely know something is up and will be asking for him, but L is the one comprehending. So the boys adjustment should be easier.
I am so grateful that today's deployments are not like they were in WW II. Then guys were gone for years and you never really knew where they were or what they were doing. You might get a letter, but it would months upon months old. Now we have FB, email and SKYPE. We have video equipment and recordings. The deployments are so much shorter! So thankful to be a military family now rather than 60 years ago!
M got few extra uniform supplies at no cost to our family...that was a bonus. Since Officers don't get a uniform allowance and the uniforms are a bit expensive, free to our family is always good.
L and Connor are very very very independent children. They need no one and no body. That personality will make the transition easier. As long as Caleb has mama, he is fine.
10 hours per week of free-to-our-family child care at the Child Development Center. I am so grateful to have a bit of free childcare! That means I will have time to grocery shop and run errands all by myself!!!
The friends we have here in Okinawa are amazing!
Just a few of the good things to be thankful for! Have a good day!
Bye Bye Daddy
Our Daddy chain starts on the Daddy wall. The map of where daddy will be with his pic and the clock set to the Middle East. One link for each day until we see our precious daddy again!
Clearly the chain wraps around the whole living room.
Grandma Reynolds requested a video of the boys walking, so here you go grandma.
I was attempting to take a cute photo of Caleb. He wanted the camera so he just screamed at me instead of being cute.
Very very angry!
Connor is such a ham. He was chasing balls all over the house, pausing for a moment to be cute.
My Mother's Day crafts from L. Plus a few extra projects she has made.
The Birthday cards that have come in the mail already.
More walking
M has recorded many books on video so the kids can hold the book while he reads. He has a CD of daddy/daughter music in L's CD player. We think we are ready for this. Of course this deployment also hits me at odd times. Today I was walking through the grocery store (kid-free). I was looking for a few things M needed for packing and I starting loosing it. I realized these were the last things he needed to pack away and also that the food I was buying he would not be here to eat it. My heart was racing and my breathing was labored. Maybe the beginnings of a panic attack? I talked myself through it and calmed down with a few tears in my eyes. He is leaving. He will be gone for quite a while. I have to figure out how to do 3 kids on my own.
Please continue prayers, love, cards and encouragement!
We are so blessed to have such an awesome daddy who we will miss. Our daddy blesses us each and every day! He loves the kids! He loves me! He has dedicated his life to loving, providing and protecting us!!! Thank you God for the blessing of having a man in our life who we will miss oh so much!
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Night Away
M and I got to go away last Friday night. We stayed at the Kafuu Resort which was amazing. The Japanese bed was of course too short for M, his feet were hanging of of the bed. However, the bed was wide enough that M could sleep diagonally and still we had plenty of room. We checked into our fabulous room and went to dinner. After dinner we had a couple's massage and then back to the room we disappeared for the night. We enjoyed an ocean view and room service. We slept late and enjoyed the huge tub. We are so grateful to our friend who made this night possible by watching our 3 little monsters. It was a perfect way to have time to say our goodbyes. We now have this beautiful memory of our time together to carry us through his time away.
Double Walkers
I have a silly little song that goes something like this:
"Double the love, double the joy
Double the smiles and double the trouble.
Double the love and double the giggles.
Double, double, double, double double the love"
It's a goofy song I made up and sing to the boys. Well, now we double walkers. The boys hardly crawl anymore at all. They are walking and toddling all over the place. We still use the stroller to get in and out of the apartment building since the boys are easily distracted when left to their own devices.
Things have been very very busy here lately. The kids all got lice (mama included). We are so good at sharing! So it was several weeks of looking through L's hair several times per day. You know Caleb was shaved bald and about 25 loads of laundry later we are clear. That is not an insect I would wish on someone I dislike. I would wish it on my worst enemy, but only the worst.
L, daddy and I did Easter eggs while the boys napped. Lots of fun decorating!
Of course we are also getting daddy ready to go. He has been working many hours --- at work by 4 am every day this week! His time is very precious so we have been attempting to get in as much family time as possible. M has been so great at putting in long and sometimes stressful days and then coming home and making sure to give our family focused attention. He doesn't have much to spare by the time his head hits the pillow. But we certainly appreciate him making sure we have lots of good memories before he goes.
The boys are talking lots...mama, dada, ball, and so on. They lovebeing tortured playing with big sister. She gives them many hours of smiles while she dances around. She can be very entertaining and she LOVES an audience so this works out well for all 3 kids.
L has been having a rough time with the idea of daddy going. She keeps trying to figure out when he is going, if mommy is going, how long he'll be gone, and what are we doing while daddy is gone. She has had quite a few accidents and crying. So please pray that as head into our time without daddy, that I have patience for her and for her to have peace of mind and heart. One week ago she spent 6 hours crying and screaming because she was so frustrated. After some chatting with family members we figured out some better ways to support her. She has been even keel (sp) since. Though I know tough days will come for both of us.
Our plan to thrive while daddy is away includes:
We do have a 180 constructions paper link chain all over the living room. Each night we will rip one link off of the chain.
We have a Daddy wall where the chain starts. A map is up with a picture of daddy taped to where he will be with a clock set to his time zone. On the wall I am hanging up all of the encouraging cards we get (thank you Sharon for sending the first card) around the map. My house is starting to look like a preschool classroom with the chain and L's Mother's Day art work up also, but what can I do. This is who I am!
Each kid has a "Daddy Doll." It has a full picture of M on the pillow with a voice recorder of daddy talking to them.
Daddy has read into the Hallmark recordable books so the kids will get to hear him lots.
Anytime we get sad about daddy being away, we shout "MUSIC!", turn the music on very loudly, and then dance around the house. All 3 kids seem to really enjoy this one.
Mommy and L are planning to get pedicures once per month together to celebrate our time together.
A few pic to share with you...
Alright, my kids have been watching Little Einstiens while I tip this out, so time to be a mama again.
"Double the love, double the joy
Double the smiles and double the trouble.
Double the love and double the giggles.
Double, double, double, double double the love"
It's a goofy song I made up and sing to the boys. Well, now we double walkers. The boys hardly crawl anymore at all. They are walking and toddling all over the place. We still use the stroller to get in and out of the apartment building since the boys are easily distracted when left to their own devices.
Things have been very very busy here lately. The kids all got lice (mama included). We are so good at sharing! So it was several weeks of looking through L's hair several times per day. You know Caleb was shaved bald and about 25 loads of laundry later we are clear. That is not an insect I would wish on someone I dislike. I would wish it on my worst enemy, but only the worst.
L, daddy and I did Easter eggs while the boys napped. Lots of fun decorating!
Of course we are also getting daddy ready to go. He has been working many hours --- at work by 4 am every day this week! His time is very precious so we have been attempting to get in as much family time as possible. M has been so great at putting in long and sometimes stressful days and then coming home and making sure to give our family focused attention. He doesn't have much to spare by the time his head hits the pillow. But we certainly appreciate him making sure we have lots of good memories before he goes.
The boys are talking lots...mama, dada, ball, and so on. They love
L has been having a rough time with the idea of daddy going. She keeps trying to figure out when he is going, if mommy is going, how long he'll be gone, and what are we doing while daddy is gone. She has had quite a few accidents and crying. So please pray that as head into our time without daddy, that I have patience for her and for her to have peace of mind and heart. One week ago she spent 6 hours crying and screaming because she was so frustrated. After some chatting with family members we figured out some better ways to support her. She has been even keel (sp) since. Though I know tough days will come for both of us.
Our plan to thrive while daddy is away includes:
We do have a 180 constructions paper link chain all over the living room. Each night we will rip one link off of the chain.
We have a Daddy wall where the chain starts. A map is up with a picture of daddy taped to where he will be with a clock set to his time zone. On the wall I am hanging up all of the encouraging cards we get (thank you Sharon for sending the first card) around the map. My house is starting to look like a preschool classroom with the chain and L's Mother's Day art work up also, but what can I do. This is who I am!
Each kid has a "Daddy Doll." It has a full picture of M on the pillow with a voice recorder of daddy talking to them.
Daddy has read into the Hallmark recordable books so the kids will get to hear him lots.
Anytime we get sad about daddy being away, we shout "MUSIC!", turn the music on very loudly, and then dance around the house. All 3 kids seem to really enjoy this one.
Mommy and L are planning to get pedicures once per month together to celebrate our time together.
A few pic to share with you...
Totally random pic of Connor. He and his brother like to pick up a phone or remote and "call daddy."
I am sure you can figure out this is L and I coloring the Easter eggs. After days upon days of quizzing asking her what Easter is about, she finally answers with "When Jesus died."
So maybe we are getting through?
Never mind the white trash bra straps sticking out -- I always try to look my worst when I know we are doing a "photo worthy" activity. Not sure how I plan that out, but you know...I have twins...which is my answer for anything unimpressive about my appearance ;).
She is a little expressive. Think she gets that from M?
Finished project.
Alright, my kids have been watching Little Einstiens while I tip this out, so time to be a mama again.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Couple of Pics and a little news
Caleb being super cute. He got a hair cut yesterday so new pics will be up soon.
Connor being his happy self.
None of my kids have ever been kids who fall asleep just wherever they are...until now. We must've worn Caleb out that day.
Going for a ride. The boys often go on tandem crawls, rides and walks around the house.
The kids are all doing well. I am not sure if I posted, but the boys no longer need Physical Therapy. They are caught up and on the move. They are both walkers and keeping us all up and down and up and down.
Other news is that M is leaving for about 6 months. I am not posting anymore information than that due to security concerns. Please pray that our family does not just survive the time he is away. I want all 5 of us to thrive and especially readjust well when daddy comes back. Please pray for this mama as I do life on my own with no family here and no daddy. Please pray that M will be safe and come home a better man because of his experience.
Things you can do to support this military family:
I will soon post an address for M. You can send him cards and packages.
I would REALLY appreciate encouraging notes in the mail. I am overwhelmed by the idea of having M gone for so long and would really appreciate your thoughts in a card or two.
Come visit! We would love to have visitors to break up the time M is away.
Phone calls just to let us know you are thinking of our family.
We are grateful for the amazing friends we have here, but it is still going to tough to have daddy gone for so long. Any prayer you pray during the time he is away would be appreciated!!!
Friday, April 1, 2011
Our family headed up to the aquarium last month. L loved the "Nemo" fish.
A whale shark looking at the boys -- or the boys looking for the whale shark.
L at the dolphin show.
This year the wonderful aquarium had a huge and absolutely gorgeous floral display.
L wanted to take a pic in front of the ladybug since that is what Grandma Reynolds calls her.
So grandma, this is for you!
L got a kitchen and this is her posing for the picture so that all our friends and family to see her wonderful cooking skills. Caleb was helping to cook as well ;).
The kids love their ball pit. they play in there a lot!!!!
A few photos for everyone to enjoy. The kids are doing so well! Mama and Dada are enjoying them lots. We have had a rough couple of weeks but things are getting better. M's unit has been helping without the Tsunami relief so I can't be too frustrated with the many hours away.
Couple of updates on the kids --
Connor: saying dada, dog and ball
walks about ten steps
eats big boy food, I can cut up our meals and he eats right along with us
Caleb: saying dada, mama, ball, balloon, and trying to repeat lots of other words
walks up to 12 or so steps
also eating big boy food
Those are the biggest things. Oh---we graduated from Physical Therapy. The boys are caught up and no longer have any delays.
L:
not too much except that her birthday is next week. She requested a Shrek party with orange decorations. She also asked for a cake to smash her fist in just like the 4th movie.
Each day we are so thankful for 3 healthy kids. We know what a blessing it is to have health!
Have a great day!
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